Overwhelm is common these days, and we wear it like a badge of honor, to the extent that we feel “bad” when we are not SUPER BUSY, STRESSED, or MULTITASKING…
It’s more common for us to feel “off” and unsettled when we are NOT spinning around like a top and at rest. Is it not ridiculous that our nervous system has no f*cking idea how to respond to stillness?
Let me tell ya, and this dilemma is directly linked to a little acronym.
BTFAR Beliefs, Thoughts, Feelings, Actions, Results
What we experience and live with are the results. We tend to gloss over how we got there. Furthermore, we have created life more focused on what we don’t want vs. what we do want.
Spending so much energy in the space of fear and anxiety looking ahead and back, completely missing out on what is here and now.
The RESULT, AKA “Our Life Experience,” is full of stress and overwhelm, springing from beliefs that are SOOOO outdated, old-fashioned, and frequently not even our own.
Interesting. Consider a common result. Let’s work it backward…
RESULT> Relationship Resentment when what we say we desire Fulfillment
ACTIONS> spending little or no 1:1 time, rarely connecting intimately, often scheduling without consideration of the other, prioritizing tasks over relationships, super transactional and pure shit!
…and dare I go here, YEAH…I think I will. Let’s bring in EMOTIONS EEEKKK FEELINGS (if you can’t tell by now, I’m all about getting uncomfortable)
FEELINGS> Lonely, frustrated, angry, abandoned, scared, suspicious, rejected, sad, disappointed, regret, guilt, shame, holy shit… I’m getting depressed just listing these!
THOUGHTS> I am taken for granted. They are selfish and narcissistic—no wonder the divorce rate is so high. If I want it done right, I have to do it myself, and they don’t care anyway, don’t bother. They will say no always.
BELIEFS> Relationships are complex, and Marriage doesn’t last, life’s a bitch and then you die, People don’t change, nobody cares what I think, asking for help is weak, my opinion doesn’t matter, I am not worthy of love, things never work out
These last two can get quite nasty…
Hold the phone (one of my mom’s favorite sayings, RIP Rosie).
Breathe, take a beat, and settle as much as possible. WTF just happened here? Did I get all worked up about something and spend Energy, Time, and Resources because my focus is on SUPREME BULLSH*T! Where did I hear or learn this, and how long have I chosen to believe it…depending on the current state of happiness, perhaps way too long!
I invite you to explore discernment and curiosity, how do these beliefs feel in my body, where they live in my body, and how much space they are taking up in my life?
Here is where my expertise comes in . . . I can help you reverse engineer the limiting beliefs that have controlled our happiness for so long. My Masterclass is intended for you to go within, find the root of these beliefs, and squash them to begin to nourish yourself to start feeling worthy, loved, and grow towards the joy you’re intended to experience.
What if you shift your beliefs too. . .
I am worthy, loved, supported, and held in the highest regard. I deserve and “get” to be happy and fulfilled in my life, relationships, and future endeavors?
Let that sink in!
FEEL that energy, power, impact, and intention, DAMN! You’re new BTFAR shifts to . . .
THOUGHTS> Relationships are the Spice of Life. Every day brings newness and opportunity. What is this here to teach me? How can I be more open and aware of myself and others? I am grateful for what I have and who I get to share it with
FEELINGS> Love, connection, joy, compassion, gratitude, sovereignty, peace, comfort, satisfaction, relief
Wowwooohhaa, how’s that landing in the nervous system?
ACTIONS> Reaching out for support, taking time and space for connection, being present and aware of wants and needs, prioritizing love and relationship, setting boundaries, sharing sacred time and space with self and others, listening to understand, not responding.
RESULTS> FULFILLED relationships, clarity, and basis for creating the resting place of happiness in life, relationships, and future endeavors
I invite you to consider some of your beliefs and run them through BTFAR. I’d love to hear what comes to you while you do this . . . please visit my website and schedule your first FREE Flow session with me today or inquire about my upcoming Graceful Growth Mastermind that launches June 15th!